Memories, those times in your life to which you can reflect to at any moment. They're all so precious even some bad ones because they form who you are. When you want to remember someone close to you who may have passed, the memories are bitter sweet. When you reflect on birthday parties, or curling up with your parents when you were once a child. That nostalgia makes a warm smile cast over your face.
Though there are some memories that you might wish to cast from all conciseness, they molded you too. Sometimes I don't like the way something went in my life, but I know that as much as the thought tempts me I wouldn't change a thing.
Now that I am grown up man, I can still remember the days I sat on my Tatay's lap. I can hear him telling the stories of when he was young. They weren't your typical walking ten miles to school in the mountain stories. They held more to the imagination than that. It was my time a time that will never fade into the past.
To my Tatay, I know that I'm still the same little boy I was 16 years ago. Some things never change.
When people look at my Tatay, they only see the pain he lives with. If only they could look further past the surface. Through my eyes, I see the same amount of strength and love that was always inside of him. He has taught me, through his ups and downs that it's what you have at this moment in time that matters. Every few months, we have the same conversation. It starts with him telling me how proud he is of the person I have become. Then it ends quite drastically. He lets me know that his days are numbered there are no guarantees in life. The most important thing to him is being able to see me as often as he can.
Old age with it the strongest sense of fear you ever thought possible. In the blink of an eye, you're thrust into the unknown. The question lingers If there is no tomorrow, will God give us the rest of today? That is what my Tatay lives for. He is determined to make the most out of what time he has left. In his own words, "Life's too short to get worked up over what can't be changed". These are the words to live by.
There is more to my Tatay than any other person in this world. He is the most unselfish and compassionate person that I have ever known. I always tell him how much I love him and thank him for being my tatay. To anyone walking in my shoes, the most important thing to know is that nothing will ever compare to the love of my father.
There are two objectives to writing, to impress and to express. Both are fine, but the other exceeds story telling. I was gripped by the emotions on this one. The sincerity and the depth of personal attachment have made me shed a tear or two.
ReplyDelete